God is so cool how He always does that!

I've been craving a really good Bible study lately.... like a Beth Moore with lots of homework. I know, I know.... a glutton for punishment! How can I do homework when I can't even keep up with my kids' homework?! I called my neighbor Amy and asked if she was interested and coincidentally (God is sovereign) she was starting up a Beth Moore study the very next week! Cool, huh?

The Bible Study title is Breaking Free. Now I did this study about ten years ago and boy did I have a lot of things to break free from! But now it is just as fresh and exciting and new because over the past ten years I've worked up a whole other set of things that need to be dealt with. Also, (again God is sovereign) I got to meet another neighbor who is part of the group whom I'd only met in passing before. Not only do we share the same house number (although on different streets), we share a lot of other similarities and struggles with our children. I feel like we are Divine Appointments in one another's lives.

Okay, so I'm starting week one of the homework and part of it is to memorize a verse for the week. When I read the verse I was so excited I just HAD to share it!!!

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,

because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor.

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,

to proclaim freedom for the captives

and release from darkness for the the prisoners...

~Isaiah 61:1

WOW! This is NOT a coincidence and I'm again amazed by God and His perfect timing and His love for me. This is just another reassurance of the calling on my life... to be His ambassador to the ends of the earth! Did I mention that I CANNOT WAIT to go to Uganda with Ekissa in May so I can do the work that the Lord has called me to do?

Disenchantment, Part 2

Again, let me add my disclaimer here: I am not directing this post at any one church or person or population segment. It is merely my opinion, which I am fully entitled to. I in know way expect everyone to agree with me. I don’t expect ANYONE to agree with me. This is just what God has laid on my heart through His word and the path my life has taken. If it steps on your toes, then maybe it’s time you take a good hard look at the direction of your church and the condition of it’s heart. And from some of you I can hear a resounding “AMEN” because your church is doing things right. Take it or leave it.

Over the course of my life I have found myself sitting on the other side of a counselor's desk, pastor's office, or paying for the listening ear of some other professional. One of the very best things anyone ever told me was this: Faith is a FACT, not a feeling. Scott was counseling me at a time when I was doing a lot of working for the church, my husband was doing a lot of working in the church, I was a counselor to others, and from the outside I looked like I had it all together, yet inside I was a mess. I was tired and I just didn't "feel" God's presence in my life. Everything was going wrong. Scott drove home this piece of wisdom: Faith is a FACT, not a feeling. This has become my mantra of sorts and whenever (which is often) I find myself not "feeling it", I fall back on those words. Thanks Scott for your dedication to the Truth in Grace!

Okay, so you know my mantra: FAITH IS A FACT, NOT A FEELING.

Why is it in church services these days we are trying so hard to evoke "feelings"? We try to create this environment where people can "feel" and "encounter" while they're there, yet when they leave and this "environment" is gone, they go about their lives without any real connection to the Living God?

THIS HAS HAPPENED IN MY OWN HOUSE.

One of my children went on a youth retreat where lots of the kids experienced "feelings" of the Holy Spirit being upon them. This in and of itself was powerful to witness and was definitely a remarkable thing. It was a "mountaintop experience".

But, during the weeks that followed my child slumped into depression and anxiety. This child was locked up in their room, pouring over scripture (which was NOT a bad thing), praying, and crying out to God because they wanted that "feeling" back. It was an extreme let-down that God was not manifesting Himself in the same way as on the mountain. My child thought there was something wrong with themself, that they were inadequate, not good enough, etc. I held my child and rocked and prayed for my child while they sat sobbing in a heap on the floor thinking that they didn't know the secret to intimacy with their Creator.

FAITH IS A FACT, NOT A FEELING.

I got to pray with and tell my child that his/her faith was not dependent upon how they felt, but that their faith was real, and that God was real, and that He desired a relationship with them whether they could feel it or not.

Haven't we all been here? I have had many a day, especially lately, that I could not "feel" God's presence, but my faith lies in the fact that He is always there, always loving, always merciful, always extending His hand, whether I feel it or not.

FAITH IS A FACT, NOT A FEELING

There are four hundred years between the old and new testaments in the Bible where God was silent. Does that mean that He wasn't there? NO! God is always there, whether we're in a car, scrubbing toilets, doing laundry, punching a time clock, or in a church.

I'm disenchanted with the whole "fabricating a feeling" thing. It's hurt me in my past, and now it's hurt my family. I've seen it hurt others. If there is one thing that I want to impart on my children, it is my mantra: FAITH IS A FACT, NOT A FEELING. It is my desire for the "church" in general to make this part of theirs, instead of focusing on whether people "feel" welcomed, or "feel" comfortable, or "feel" entertained. Sure, we want people to leave "feeling" loved, by us and our Creator, but they also need to be sure that God is God no matter how they feel.

Where is the balance? No really, I'm asking. I'm struggling with this one. John 13:35 says “Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” But what does that look like? Does it make us strive to make people "feel" a certain way? Or should we just be out there, loving, serving, and spreading Hope? Just asking.....

My Disenchantment with the Contemporary Church, Part 1

Ahh, the proverbial elephant in the room, the one people tiptoe around. As they say here in the south…. It’s a big ‘un!

Let me add my disclaimer here: I am not directing this post at any one church or person or population segment. It is merely my opinion, which I am fully entitled to. I in know way expect everyone to agree with me. I don’t expect ANYONE to agree with me. This is just what God has laid on my heart through His word and the path my life has taken. If it steps on your toes, then maybe it’s time you take a good hard look at the direction of your church and the condition of it’s heart. And from some of you I can hear a resounding “AMEN” because your church is doing things right. Take it or leave it.

My Disenchantment With The Contemporary American Church, Part 1

It is no secret that I’ve become disenchanted with the contemporary Christian Church these days. It’s just that when you’ve looked into the faces of innocent children that go days and weeks eating only bugs and poop, it changes your perspective. Then, to see them raise their faces and hands to God and praising him for His provision and being part of a “church service” right there in the middle of nowhere with a dirt floor and a couple of drums, well it sends chills up your spine. I know without a doubt that I saw the face of Jesus in that place and amongst those people.

So I struggle. I walk into a typical contemporary church and am supposed to be wowed and transcended into this “worship experience” of sounds and lights and artificial fog. It seems that this is how we are wooing the “unchurched” into our church services, by creating this artificial “environment”. The Bible says in John 13:35 “Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”

Do our churches attract people because we love, or do they attract people because we have the coolest music, a laser light show and superb programming?

It’s just something to think about. I’m not saying that those things are inherently bad, but if they are our focus, then we’ve gotten off track. That is my opinion. More later.

Why Go?

Recently I was asked this question: Why would you spend a few thousand dollars on going on a mission trip when you could just send the money and have it go much further?

That was a pretty good question and I started thinking about it. I talked around it a little bit but this was something I really needed to pray about and be able to adequately communicate.

My first answer was easy. God had told me to GO. This wasn't an audible voice that I heard with my ears, but rather a verse that God gave to my heart.

"Go swift messengers to a people tall and smooth skinned, to a people feared far and wide, an aggressive nation of strange speech whose land is divided by rivers" ~ Isaiah 18:2

God told me to GO. He didn't say write a check... He said GO.

I was reading in Luke and was captivated as the words jumped off the page at me: Jesus told his disciples to GO! He told them to NOT take any money. (Luke 10: 3-4)

Jesus told His disciples to GO.

Then, by no coincidence (God is sovereign), I listened to a podcast by David Platt, pastor of Brookhills Church in Burmingham, AL. It was called "One Life With A Global Gospel". David told this story:

He was getting ready to take a $3,000 trip to Sudan. He knew this was a lot of money. Someone in the church came to him and said "Why are you going to spend three thousand dollars on a trip when you could just send the $3,000 and it could go a lot farther than you going there?

(Sound familiar? emphasis mine)

David says he wrestled with that.... until he got to the Sudan and spent time encouraging his Christian brothers and sisters there, sharing in their persecutions and struggles. One brother looked back at David and said, "David, over the last twenty years of persecution many different organizations have sent resources to us and we are extremely thankful, But, " he said, "do you know how we can tell who a true brother is? A true brother comes to be with you in your deepest time of need." He thanked David for being a true brother and at that moment it hits him... this is the very essence of the Gospel.

When God chose to bring salvation to you and me, He did not send gold or silver or cash or a check. He sent Himself. So how will we ever show this Gospel to the world if all we ever send is our money?

If we only send or spend our money we will miss part of the point of global missions!

Thanks to David for that awesome reminder. If only the Church in America would embrace it!

The curse of Compassion

I was born a compassionate person.  I am emotional.  I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve.  At times, this has been a curse in my life.  I even hated God for the compassion that I felt for others because I lost several things in my quest to be a savior to those in some sort of need, whether it be a physical or emotional one.  I would cry out to God "WHY ME?!  WHY DO I HAVE TO CARE SO MUCH WHEN NO ONE ELSE SEEMINGLY DOES??" I was the girl with the weight of the world in her hands.

During my teenage years I rebelled against my compassionate nature and tried very very hard to turn my thoughts to my own self gratification and righteousness.  I usually succeeded because I am very strong-willed and God gave me the freedom to choose my own path.  As it turns out, it was a very hard and bumpy path with lots of twists, turns, potholes, and even chasms in it.  But even when, in our own stubbornness, we choose the wrong path and try to change what God has made us to be, He is there, like a crossing guard.  At the crossroads of life, which are very numerous if we stop to count them, He is there pointing us in the right direction.  The question is:  Do we choose His path or our own?  Do we go where we feel He is leading us or do we ignore Him because His way doesn't make sense to us?  I regrettably admit that I have taken my own road many times and most often it leads to pain and confusion.  But "God is not a God of confusion, but of peace" ~ 1 Corinth. 14:33

The past several years of ministry have been somewhat confusing for me.  Of course, lots of good things have come out of it but it's like I've been wandering and searching and trying to figure out my place in the world and in the church (the collective body of Christ).  I've served in many ways and capacities but have still felt confusion; never really 'at home' in the role that I was in.  Again, God has certainly used me in every area, and for that I am eternally grateful.

But once again I find myself at a crossroads in my life.  I'm doing my best to listen to the Crossing Guard and to embrace the gifts that He has given me that will put me on the perfect path that He has laid out for me.  This is always easier said then done; the enemy often tries to confuse me, even within the church. 

I invite you to embark on this journey with me and to help me to run the race that He has set out for me.  I don't know exactly what this looks like, what it will mean, or where it will lead me.  I do know that I will try my best to submit to my Father's will and I covet all prayers for strength and endurance on the road ahead.

Until then,

K